also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize