Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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