no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Randomize