I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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