Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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