I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
