Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize