its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
And then he peed in my hair
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