we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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