Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
