Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Swine flu is the new snow day.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
