Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize