um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize