i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Less talking, more tequila
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
