i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
