Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I cannot find my penis.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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