How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
