nut hugger
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
