But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
