can we get nightvision for the apartment?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I could fuck to npr.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
