it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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