I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
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