She is in my trunk
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
