im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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