Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
