I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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