Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I think pants incapable of making pants work
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
