Christians are straight up FREAKS
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize