Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
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I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
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Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
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