I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
