Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
