dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
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