I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
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She's never allowed to turn 21 again
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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