I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
