make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
