worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
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