Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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