Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
