i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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