My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
