it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
