This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
