At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
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