spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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