lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
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