That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
