Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(517): View more from Michigan

areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!

(616): View more from Michigan

you srsly need to quit going to that bar

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(563): View more from Iowa

The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy

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(845): View more from New York

I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.

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(256): View more from Alabama

she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump

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(318): View more from Louisiana

Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.

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(269): View more from Michigan

My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over

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(256): View more from Alabama

The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔

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