tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
