Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize