They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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