please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
